I'll come up with something in a minute.


I have sneezed myself into a headache again.

And the shock of all those sneezes has brought on a pain down my right arm that has the local White Mage Union (Local #432) claiming that shit ain’t in their contract.

Must be spring.


Someone cute, sweet or at least attentive come and administer relief/loving attention please!



Well fuck, I guess I’ll go to bed then and see if I can’t sleep and sneeze at the same time.

March 31, 2009 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Why is it funny then?

I have no idea why, but there are some jokes I don’t find funny. That’s not the odd bit. The odd bit is that if you were to simply interject the punch line, I’ll laugh almost every time. I’ll give you an example…

Little Johnnie’s teacher asked him how his weekend was.
“Horribly, a car hit my dog in the ass,” he said.
She said, “Rectum.”
“Wrecked him?” Johnnie said. “Damn near killed him!”

Normally the joke is played out a bit longer, sometimes it’s a scatological joke. The thing is that it’s just not funny to me like that. It seems like it’s trying to hard to get to that punch line. However, if you walk up to me and say “And then he says ‘Wrecked ‘im? Damn near killed ‘im!’” I will laugh just about every time. I’ve tried this on other people, walking into a room, announcing my line and leaving. Always gets a laugh.

Another example
And then the doctor says, “If this is my thermometer, where’s my pen?”

See? You don’t even need to know the rest of the joke, you know comedy when you hear it.

And yet, if you were to try to tell me the whole joke, I’d sigh and grin out of basic politeness, but I’d feel dead inside. Although to be honest, that’s normally just because most folk tell jokes so badly. It’s worse when it’s a good joke too, because a joke told badly won’t just make you feel dead inside, it’ll make you feel like Hell can hold no horrors for you because you’ve been through this. Well, they make me feel that way anyhow.

EDIT: Why yes, I did write this about three days ago and finding it wasn’t ever really going to go anywhere just decided to post it. How ever did you guess?

March 31, 2009 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment