I'll come up with something in a minute.

Shallow Thoughts: Star Wars

I wonder if in about 10 years, when the kids who grew up with the Star Wars prequels hit their 20s, if we aren’t going to see another reversal on George Lucas. Maybe when they aren’t viewed from the stance of nostalgia the kids will come to the conclusion that these movies aren’t really that bad. They don’t succeed in doing what they set out to do maybe, but that they are a good visual treat at least.

I suppose they’ll say that much of the hatred for the maligned trilogy comes down to the fans who weren’t transported back to their childhood. They might even claim that this expectation was a feat too great for even the mighty Quinn Lucas to perform. You’ve got to remember these will be kids who are about ten now and will be rebellious and irritated at all us old folk in that day.

Really I wonder how not having an expectation will effect their judgment of the end product. In ten years, will the compass come full circle causing everyone to just decide that George Lucas was a visionary ahead of his time again? Will Jar Jar Binks be seen as some perfect pre-post-post-camp icon?

Will anyone even be discussing it? Maybe what’ll end up happening is that even the prequels will be considered too much of their parent’s thing and they’ll ignore it completely, opting instead to complain about how Sponge Bob the Next Generation craps all over the original.

May 4, 2009 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment

NOW!

As a respite for that, I present Vienna the kitten being too fucking cute for words.

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May 4, 2009 Posted by | Uncategorized | | Leave a comment

Adventures in Dining (Or, why I never leave the house)

So my hands hurt so bad this weekend I had trouble holding a knife and fork to eat dinner with. Weather, a flair up, I don’t know. I’ve had pain before, but never this bad. It wasn’t just the hands of course. My shoulder, elbows and knee also all got their licks in as well, but my hands have really been the ones giving me a ride this week. You can limp if your knee hurts. You can not lift your arm above your head if your shoulder is bugging you. You can avoid having to reach out to get something so your elbow won’t bend into one of the painful positions. You can do that and cope, but what the fuck do you do when holding a fork is agony? What do you do when the idea of trying to cook something is literally laughable? Well, you go out for dinner and try not to show how much it hurts trying to manipulate the tools of eating.

On the bright side, I had a terrible meal at an overly expensive hippie restaurant on Saturday. It’s good that when my hands hurt so much I can barely hold a fork and knife I’m given a dry lump of what is supposed to be superior organic chicken which turned out to be a dull and lifeless as anything from one of Tyson’s farms. It’s good because I already hated this place upon sitting down and there wasn’t a single point of positive re-enforcement for me to have even a momentary inkling of good feelings about the experience besides our waitress being kind of cute.

I might have handled it if the place hadn’t been so intolerably pleased with itself for adhering to every hip neo hippy bullshit trend in the book. If you’re going to be all smug about how environmentally friendly your restaurant is, you need to have good food. Work on the fucking fundamentals and deliver a lecture (Delivered in flipbook form on each and every table) once you can cook something. Seriously, a $23 piece of chicken shouldn’t be more flavorless than something I can get at Boston Market. I don’t care if you grew the herbs in your own greenhouse that works on heat exchanges or that you don’t think bamboo isn’t a wood (yes it fucking is, it just isn’t a tree) if you’re food is shit I will never come back. Work on your fucking fundamentals you hippie piece of shit! After you’ve proven you can do your job, then and only then can you try to tell me what kind of light bulb to have in my house.

To continue the trend…

I also had a lousy meal today at Applebee’s, so that’s nice too. It’s good that no matter where I go I’m served substandard food that I wouldn’t give to the cats. You have to accentuate the positive. Consistency is an oft looked for virtue, right? If all the places are serving the sort of food I wouldn’t give to the cats then as a collective the restaurant industry has finally achieved a mean state of shitiness and having reached the ultimate level of entropy the standards won’t actually slip any further having gone as far as they can.

We’ve hit the heat death of the restaurant industry, and that’s nice. It’s nice to know we’ve accomplished something today. I’m just glad to have witnessed something, even if it’s the end of my lingering faith in America to cook a fucking piece of animal carcass. It’s appropriate that no more heat can move between objects, since it has reached a mean temperature, since I assume it will mean all the steaks will also be cold. I hope they all fail, fuck ‘em one and all.

The one meal I’ve had that I didn’t make that was in anyway good was a flame-broiled hamburger from Burger King. Yeah, that’s the only thing that was good. I made steamed and deep fried won tons when we got home though so I have eaten something worth eating today. My hands chilled out on the pain for long enough for me do that.

So I have won tons. I made them. I have steamed and deep fried won tons, they are yummy. You can’t have any, because you aren’t here. If you were here, I’d give you one.

May 4, 2009 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment