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The Branson

Does Richard Branson ever strike you as an odd sort of guy?

I mean, he started with music, yeah okay fine. He sold records out of his car and then moved up to making records and got his own music stores. No problem. How did an airline become part of it? Or a mobile phone company? Or a line of vodka and cola? Or any of the other things he’s got his hands into. Was he flying back and forth and just saying to himself “Wouldn’t it be more cost effective if I owned the plane and gave other people a lift in exchange for gas money?” and then went to his accountant and asked “What’ll it cost to buy an airline?” and the accountant said “Probably forty-five million or so.” And Branson pulled out a wad of bills and tossed it to the accountant saying “Well, here’s fifty, make it look pretty and get Acoustic Alchemy to play live in the planes during the cross Atlantic trips.” True story.

Did he then realize that they were spending a fortune paying for the soft drinks they were serving on the plane and again he went to the accountant “How much for a cola company?” And the poor guy looks and says “Twenty-six million” and Branson throws him another wad of cash (I assume Branson is the kind of guy who keeps a billion in his jeans just for flash) and says “He’s thirty, use the change to buy yourself something pretty.”

And the phone company? Was he talking on the phone and just couldn’t stand paying T-Mobile? Did he again go to the accountant? “How much for a cell phone company?” And the accountant just looks at the camera and says “I’d stop him, but it always seems to work out.”

It just seems odd, because most the time you can see the logical progression and with him I can’t. Walt Disney started with cartoons, then went to live action movies, a record company, TV and ended with an amusement park. All entertainment, you can see where he’s going. I fail to see the connection between music sales, soda, air planes, trains, and a space fleet. Unless the guy is really Cobra Commander and has planed to spike the cola with a mind control substance that will be triggered by the phones all carried by his trains and planes before the orbiting death lasers set up by his… I’m going to be killed before the day is out aren’t I?

August 13, 2009 - Posted by | Uncategorized

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