I'll come up with something in a minute.

With a Time Machine…

If I had a simple time machine, I could gather the best minds ever. More than that, I could gather together a super group! Like the A-Team… only even more AWESOME!

My All Time Historical Bad-Ass Team

The Main Hero Type (I couldn’t think of a better name for the “Just Plain Heroic type Hero” distinction)
James Butler Hickok (lawman, gunfighter, gambler, scout, Civil War soldier, stage coach driver and abolitionist)
Sir William Marshal (The greatest knight that ever lived)
Wong Fei Hung (Martial artist, Doctor, revolutionary, righteous dude)
Ṣalāḥ ad-Dīn Yūsuf ibn Ayyūb (He kicked ass, took names, and wasn’t a dick about it)
Hone Heke (Frankly I just like his “I said FUCK OFF!” style)
Spartacus (Because some of these should be the excepted answers)

Bi-sexual/bi-curious Prettyboy Asskickers (the girls seem to be really into these guys these days)
Alexander The Great (Never lost, fucked everything he could get his dick in)
Richard the Lionheart (Gay as Springtime!)
Horatio Nelson (He did ask Hardy to kiss and banged Emma Hamilton like a screen door. And look at him! That is one pretty motherfucker)

Charming Asskickers (the kind who could fuck your wife from across the room)
George Custer (Loved his wife too much to fuck yours)
Billy Bishop (Too busy flying to fuck your wife)
Lord George Gordon Byron (He probably did fuck your wife, and if you check he probably fucked you too. I should have put in him the Bi group.)
Harold Marshall (Cause he looks like Errol Flynn with an attitude)

Sexy Russian Agent (I’m a product of the 80s and the cold war as a whole, there was ALWAYS a sexy Russian Agent in the mix)
Catherine The Great (With Cathy on our team, we don’t need another Sexy Russian Agent)

Beautiful and Deadly Girls of Action (Oh fuck off! Get over the feminism for three minutes and enjoy these babes!)
Tomoe Gozen (Best Samurai chick I could find)
Lyudmila Pavlichenko (The most kick ass girl sniper like ever)
Boudica (Don’t mess with her daughters)
Æthelburg of Wessex (Because she burned Taunton down… by herself)
Yim Wing-chun (She invented a kind of Kung Fu, what more do you need?)

Engineers (someone has to make the gadgets and the vehicals which will be turned into toys)
Hero of Alexandria (invented everything, even the stuff he didn’t)
Isambard Kingdom Brunel (He could engineer the fuck outta any problem)

Bad Boys (the brooding outsiders)
Ned Kelly (He made himself a suit of armor and went to fight the law, and the law still won)
Miyamoto Musashi (Like Wolverine, only real)
Nathan Hale (We’ll need spies)
James MacLaine & William Plunkett (Gentlemen Highwaymen)

Tough as Nails Boss (The Boss, the one who’s tough as nails)
Ulysses S. Grant (He’s the boss applesauce!)

February 3, 2010 - Posted by | Uncategorized

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