I'll come up with something in a minute.

Post #922 : In which I encourage criminals.

Did you hear about the prozac heist? Terrible crime. Awful. It will lead to many people getting hurt.

and yet…

Thank Fancy there are still such criminals in the world! Someone with ambition, style, panache and an actual plan.

They climbed walls, repelled down others, cut holes in the roof, dangled over the floor to disable the security system, built a fake vault to trick the cameras, wore make-up so they could look like other people, one of the girls distracted the guards by showing off her cleavage and they all drove away in a fleet of sooped up minis!

Okay, some of that information might be inaccurate, but who cares? Read the story, I’m not that far off really.

March 17, 2010 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Don’t mind them really.

You know why I don’t mind the Twilight movies?

The Olsen Twins.

I never found them in the least bit attractive, but lots of guys who were my age and older were drooling for the day they’d be legal. The argument was that then it would be okay to want to have sex with them. However, my argument was that they’d wanted to do these two when since they were 15 and no amount of “but they’re legal now” made a 30 or 40 year old guy wanting to bang a 15 year old okay. No one complained much about it though, they just sort of accepted a bunch of Countdown to Legal timers and shrugged. Same thing with Britney Spears and Emma Watson and a bunch of other teen idols.

And I don’t mind girls drooling over a young guy with a hot body, because of Megan Fox. Another girl I find strangely uninteresting, but seems to be the new hotness. Seriously, why can’t we fall in love with chicks like Myrna Loy again? I know Myrna is dead, I know Gene Tierney’s dead too. Damn it all to hell though, when will it be okay to love again?

Point is that women are getting to a point where they can objectify young men the way men have been objectifying young women for some considerable amount of time. We’re beginning to reach a point of equilibrium. In another ten years it’ll be okay for guys to admit they like needle point and that they don’t think porn is awesome. Yes, some guys can admit to knitting now, but we know what kind of guys those are and they already think crying like a little girl during that scene in Bambi when his mother gets shot* is acceptable. You’ve gotta man up during that scene. That’s what separates the tough guys like me from the whiny girls like you. We’re working towards a place though, and this is an important step. Girls can be more aggressive, guys can be a bit more passive, and we’ll all soon just be people.

Mind you, I still hate the books. I’ve read a little about them and the pillar of cheese in the shape of Jane Austen wishes it could come up with something that evil and profane. I want to get Gloria Steinem, Susan B. Anthony, and Boadicea to go stomp on her every time I hear about how she thinks females should act.

*OMG! SPOILERS! Snape kills Bambi’s Mom and Vader turns out to be his dad!

March 17, 2010 Posted by | Uncategorized | | Leave a comment