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Three Points about Cancer

Point One:
I really, really, REALLY don’t like the Save the ta-tas movement. Seriously, don’t we objectify women enough without telling them that their soul worth is their boobs? I mean… breast cancer fucking kills! Can’t we have some consideration for the human being attached to those breasts, worrying about the fact that this lump of aberrant flesh growing inside her might kill her?

I’m not sure, not having dealt with the issue first hand, but I would think the idea of discovering you have a cancer growing inside you would be terrifying. Not only that, but to have some jack ass then scream “NNOOOOO! Not the titties! I wouldn’t care if you have bone cancer, or bowel cancer, but why did you have to ruin my favorite bits?” would be less of a relief than they seem to think.

Can’t we save the women? Why must we always focus on the breast?

I will admit, I find the idea of a mastectomy to be sort of horrifying. Less because of the sexual implications (although I will admit that’s an issue) and more because I keep thinking “Haven’t we come any farther than this?” whenever I hear about it. I know, it’s a tough thing to deal with, but as a procedure, it seems almost… I can’t think of a better word than mutilation. We are talking about removing the whole breast, after all.

My point is, can we worry about the human being who has discovered that she might be killed by this horrible thing that has infected her body? I don’t know for sure, but I would think that maybe we should consider the person with the cancer and not just the place it seems to reside.

Point Two:
I’m all for positive thinking. I’m all for believing you can do it. I’m not for deluding yourself or avoiding any sense of reality for fear that it might display of fucking terrified you are.

No one ever hears a man say “Getting testicular cancer was the best thing that ever happened to me.” You know why? For the same reason men’s pants sizes are in inches instead of vague numbers. We don’t buy into that horseshit. If we can’t just grab a pair of pants and have them fit first time, we kick and scream like little children and then take our business elsewhere. If anyone pretends that having a cancerous lump on the end of our nuts is something that might turn out to be a good thing in the end, we give them five across the eyes until they talk sense again.

Women are supposed to look at breast cancer like it’s some sort of gift. What a great chance to re-evaluate your life! I’ve seen some serious talk about how what a great experience having breast cancer was because the women in question learned who their friends were and how better to cope with the world around them.

No, it’s bullshit. Cancer is and always was bullshit. Cancer is the thing that makes the faithful cringe when some atheist says “How the fuck does that fit in with this big mysterious fucking Plan this douche of yours has worked out?” If there are gods, cancer is the proof that they’re shit heads. If cancer brings people closer to their gods, I keep wanting to mention it was that same god that gave them cancer and that I’m calling social services on this abusive relationship. The gods only hit you ‘cause you make them crazy? No, their shit bags who hurt people and give them cancer for fun and passive aggressive bullshit reasons. The existence of vodka and American Idol doesn’t help their case any while I’m on the subject.

Pink ribbons and teddy bears* don’t make cancer better. It might make some people feel loved and cared for, but it makes some other people feel infantilized and devalued as an adult human being. Some people find it kind of condescending when the doctor talks to their husband because they’re not supposed to worry their fluffy little heads. Some people think they should be allowed to get mad and feel like they’ve been handed a little beach shovel and told to dig through two tons of horse-hockey. They think that being told not to complain, not to bitch, and not to moan is some serious, weapons grade bullshit.

And you know how I know cancer of a sexual organ is bullshit? Men don’t pull this “Mustn’t Grumble” bullshit when we get it. No one ever looks at cancer of the nuts as something positive that needs to be over come with things of yogurt with colors ribbons printed on them. Men know that cancer is bullshit. Women put up with the bullshit of a size 8 being different from one store to the next, they also put up with the pink ribbon bullshit. Men don’t, we want to know pants will fit without putting them on and we know loosing a sex organ is a big old pile of bullshit.

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t get on with it. If positive thinking is needed, by all means try to keep you PMA, but don’t pretend this bullshit isn’t bullshit. Be mad about it, throw a tantrum and then get on with your day.

Point Three:
Is there any guiding organization that runs the pink ribbon thing? Candy companies put pink wrappers on their candy bars and get an influx of sales as a result. Yogurt puts pink ribbons on their packaging all the time. I see more pink ribbon stuff than anything else. You’d think by now they’d have breast cancer licked. Where is all that money going? All these pink things keep selling really well, is any of the money actually going to research? I ask because I really don’t know, but I do know that money for “charities” often end up going to someone’s private jet and company cars.

And, is anyone left not aware of breast cancer? I’ve been told the whole idea is to raise awareness, but I’m pretty aware and thankfully, no one in my family has had to deal with it that I know of. So I haven’t been personally affected, and I’m really aware of breast cancer. I mean like, super aware. I know it exists, I know it kills, I’ve got a sword by the door if breast cancer tries to get in. That’s my other problem, I don’t know what to do about it or have any actual information. I’m aware, but not informed. That to me is a huge problem.

*The teddy bears are also pink.

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October 15, 2010 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment