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At the beach

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July 16, 2011 Posted by | Photo | | Leave a comment

I got your rape culture right here. (Or: A Time I Got Annoyed About a Compliment)

About… ten maybe even fifteen years ago, I went somewhere and spent some time with some people. The details are cloudy, except for this one girl. She was nice, cute, and things progressed to the state of making out. Things got mildly frisky, because things often do, but not to the point where leaving the couch for a more private setting became an issue. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to sleep with her, but I wasn’t against the idea. She was sort of sure though. At least she was sure that she didn’t want to advance to that stage just yet. So, a classic request “Can we slow down a bit” goes out.

Now there are two responses to that, either you slow down to a level of comfort in hopes of warming her up some more, or you disengage and look for other prospects. I was on the fence, as I said, so I slowed down, but didn’t abandon the girl or anything. She was nice, I was fine, things didn’t need progressing. Now some guys might try to turn on an ounce of pressure, hoping to break down walls, but I didn’t do that. I just went with her pace and we cuddled and made out slightly.

So far, so hoopy. Nothing happened, but I was fine with that. Later, Syd tells me that this girl talked to her and was impressed that I was so kind, understanding, and accommodating. I didn’t try to pressure her, or do anything that would be considered ungallant. I have been ungallant in the past, and will be so again, but that time I was evidently the Baby Bear’s Bed of make-out partners. However, that sort of annoyed me.

Let’s think about this for a second. This girl went to my girlfriend and said “Hey! Your boyfriend didn’t even try to rape me! I’m so impressed! He’s a keeper!”

And friends, right there, that’s your rape culture. When a simple act of not trying to pressure someone into sex is thought to be so astounding that it’s worthy of meritous mention. It manifests itself in smaller ways, and bigger ways, but the fact that I backed off at the request to back off and adjusted my levels to suit her needs was evidently something out of Amazing Tales and I should be on the cover getting attacked by some sort of Penis-Squid monster with a fishbowl on its head… it just annoyed me slightly. I wasn’t annoyed at the time, because it’s always useful to have a reputation as the guy you can feel safe with, but it annoys me that it’s that easy to be considered a safe smooch.

July 14, 2011 Posted by | Uncategorized | | Leave a comment

Photos: Out and About

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July 13, 2011 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment

One Classy Guy

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July 12, 2011 Posted by | Photo | | Leave a comment

Cats and masks

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July 7, 2011 Posted by | Photo | | Leave a comment

You wanna see a kangaroo? Sure you do!


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July 5, 2011 Posted by | Photo | , | Leave a comment

Many Pictures of Birds

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July 3, 2011 Posted by | Photo | , | Leave a comment

Be the change you want.

I’ve sort of had problems with the “It Get Better*” Campaign for a while now. It’s not that there are way more people who get bullied besides just gay kids, it’s not that. I know some people who are bothered because sexuality doesn’t even enter into some bulling. No, my problem tends to be that it’s way too passive for me. I’ve always had a problem with passivity, particularly when change is desired. I don’t like the idea that you should just sit back and wait for it to get better. Would Ghandi have got very far with it gets better as a rallying cry? Would Martin Luther King? Better yet, would the young men and women who rioted in the summer of 1969 at the Stonewall Inn have got very far telling each other it gets better? Allow me to suggest the answer is fuck no.
*Bisexuals need not apply because apparently they’re all lying fucks who are “Going through a phase” according to some dickheads who should be run over by a bus.

I’ve talked about this before in the past, and I still feel the same way. You can accomplish more with a sock full of pennies upside someone’s head than you can just sitting and enduring torment. Also, when you smack a bitch with a sock full of pennies, the torment will end pretty quickly, no one wants to fuck with someone who packs a sock full of pennies. I know, I’m giving advice contrary to all the advice adults have given you your whole life, but when did an “Adult” giving “Advice” sound like someone who was looking out for your best interests rather than those of the status quo? How much interest do you really think they have in you rather than things being nice and relatively quite? And when was change ever performed by people quietly enduring? The answer is… NEVER! Only by making waves, causing trouble and fighting the good fight has change ever come.

So this is what I’m asking of you – Go be the change you want in the world. Yeah, that’s right, MAKE it better, RIGHT NOW! Why should you have to wait for some day in the future? And let’s remember, even if you are queer, if you’re the wrong kind of queer, then other queers will attack you, tell you that you’re lying and assign you an identity without your consent… just like the straight bigots do. Sitting around and waiting for those assholes to remember to stop persecuting someone for their sexual identity won’t work any better than waiting for some skin headed neo-nazi to do it. Sorry, got off on a tangent about hate figures who demand their rights while denying them from others and demeaning them for their lifestyles. Where was I?


So, be the change you want to be. Go out, stop people from beating on your friends. Meet force with force. If needs be, berate and smack people who attack you. Yeah, they’ll act like you’re the one being mean to them, like they’re the victim, but after a little while they will leave you alone. And it’s hard to keep people believing you’re the victim when you keep going in and attacking the person you claim is victimizing you. They’ll learn, or they’ll stop getting sympathy for repeatedly putting their head in a tiger’s mouth. You just need to keep up the message that bullshit will not be tolerated. Be the change, be the challenge, be Captain America! Ram Captain America down their throats. And if anyone complains that the phrasing sounds aggressively gay, you just look them in the eye and say “Captain America is my penis.” girls may want to keep a small rubber dildo to wave around at moments like this. A red, white and blue penis shaped one with a star on the tip will increase the imagery.

July 1, 2011 Posted by | Uncategorized | , | Leave a comment

I seem to have humans in my pictures more and more lately.

I seem to have humans in my pictures more and more lately. It’s true, look back over the last few posts, there are almost half a dozen pictures with people them.

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July 1, 2011 Posted by | Uncategorized | | Leave a comment