I'll come up with something in a minute.

For Burger Town

Modern Warfare 2’s story is really kind of stupid. Here is a run down as to why, but suffice to say, it’s dumb.

Russia Invades America! Yeah, right.

I can give you many, many reasons beyond the ones in that little write up for why that’s stupid, but I don’t want to go into that right now. Besides, I just did. What I want to talk about is Burger Town. There is a fast food joint called Burger Town in the game, it’s a stand in for all the burger joints you can think of and during the invasion of America, you’re forced to retreat to it. This means, there are voice actors saying the line “Get to Burger Town!” and “Defend Burger Town!” while you’re fighting off the improbable Russian Hoard. A hoard who don’t seem to have a cogent staging point, or an actual plan or a very good reason for invading… but never mind! What you have is Burger Town, and them Commie Former Commie Sons of Bitches want it!

While Syd sat next to me shaking her head saying “I mean, where are they launching from? That’s heavy artillery they’re driving around, you can’t just back that up on a bus. They’d have to have an airfield, and a supply line, and… did they just demand you defend Burger town?”

And I looked at her with all the love I could muster in my eyes and said “We draw the line at burgers baby. Those borsch sucking bastards might take Nate’s Restaurant, but they won’t take Burger Town!”

As a result, I was sitting in my living room, with a greater sense of sarcasm than any of the actors yelling “FOR BURGER TOWN!” while I shot at hapless Russian Soldiers who probably had only joined for the water skiing and had asked them to put ‘no killing’ on their forms.

November 3, 2011 Posted by | Uncategorized | 1 Comment