I'll come up with something in a minute.

Things I have thought

I’ll be honest, I think gay people should be able to marry other gay people (of the same gender, natch) or even people who aren’t gay (cause, you know, I was bored and he was so nice). I also think that gun people should be able to marry their guns (I’m not sure if guns have genders). Thing is… I also think cars should be able to marry bus stops (don’t keep these lovers apart!) and razorblades should be able to call cans of whip cream out on their bullshit (because SRSLY!). I believe that every man should have the right to make an ass out of himself, so long as he doesn’t take anybody else down with him (we’ve been doing this for a while really) and that every woman should have at least one really torrid love affair with a guy half her age (Once she reaches 36). I also believe that cancer is caused by malfunctioning cells and that sticking jelly beans up your nose won’t make a difference either way (sure is fun though).

I seem to have strayed somewhat from my original intent, but at least you know that shoving jelly beans up your nose doesn’t cause cancer.

March 27, 2013 Posted by | Uncategorized | Leave a comment