I'll come up with something in a minute.

I hate what Robin Williams did, but I think I understand why he did it.

I want you to imagine something, just go on a little journey with me.

Imagine you are quick witted and clever, and that you have always been able to think of a joke to make people laugh. Imagine you have always been very empathetic, even as a child. Imagine that this made you able to always tell how people are feeling and want to help. Imagine you could find that place inside people that makes them smile.

Imagine if people referred to you as the person who lights up their day, their best friend, the best listener, because you can’t stand to see people in pain and always try to find the best way to help. Imagine that the only time you really feel alive is when you’re helping someone by making them laugh or feel understood, or give some golden piece of advice.

Now imagine how it feels to be inside that head. Feeling that people only come to you when they need something. Someone only reaches out when they need something, when they need you to be that “You” that only you can do. And imagine the disappointment when you can’t really be “You” for them. After a few hits of that, you’d have to fake it for them.

Imagine that no one around you can quite do “You” because only you can do “You” the way you do. Imagine that you come to understand this quite quickly, and that asking anyone else to do that task is a huge burden. Even if you wanted to ask someone to, you know that no one can. They’ve all come to rely on you being able to be “You” for all situations.

Now imagine that you feel alone. Imagine that you feel hopeless. Even if the people around you understand what you’re going through, none of them can really help because they don’t have the skill or the magic that you have when you’re being “You” like only you can do. People say there is help, that there are other people like you who can do “You”, but deep down you know that’s not true. Even if it were true, when you’re being “You” you always manage to find the person not laughing in the room and help them out, and no one has sought you out like “You” do.

When it comes down to it, at your darkest moment, there is just no “You” for you to fall back on.

I hate what Robin Williams did, but I think I understand why he did it.

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August 12, 2014 - Posted by | Uncategorized |

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